Kirstie Alley and Oprah need a hug.
Thanks to my beloved TIVO, I just watched the new Oprah show with Kirstie Alley and have to say I’m overwhelmed with mixed feelings. I mean, I’m glad Oprah and Kirstie came out this year and admitted they’re human and fell off the wagon, etc. but I also see what’s behind all the jokes and laughing. I see myself.
I’ve never really talked about what I do on here and some of you may or may not know, but I’m a writer/director (commercials, music videos, films) and I know what it’s like to make jokes when you’re dying inside. I’ve become a pro at it and even though the world and everybody around me thinks I’m the most confident person on the planet, there’s a little piece of me that just wants to find a dark corner and crawl into the fetal position when I see myself on TV or in magazines. Ironically, all of that went out the window when I started shooting a documentary, and I am SO not saying I’m anywhere near an OPRAH or KIRSTIE ALLEY. That’s just nuts, and I’m TOTALLY thankful for any and all exposure because it helps me pay the TIVO bill, but it’s also an undeniable reminder of what I’ve done to myself.
I always wonder what people think when they see me and, of course, I’ve perfected the funny fat guy routine. I’m almost numb to it now, and I’m not saying that’s NOT a part of who I am. It is, but I want to be the funny NORMAL guy. I want to just be me. Don’t worry, I’m not going to break out into an Ethel Merman song, but today when I saw Kirstie on Oprah joking around and acting all aloof about her weight gain I could see what was behind it. I could see her doing the same thing I do all the time, and I just wanted to reach into the TV and give her a mighty Roman White hug to let her know she wasn’t alone. None of us are and that’s worth remembering.
Yeah, it’s crazy hard, it sucks, and it even hurts. But I want to believe it’s possible to truly change. So, if you see Oprah or Kirstie walking down the street, open your arms and go in for a big old bear hug. Let them know it’s from Roman . . . and if you need bail money later just give me a call.